Kyler's Birth

 
From the very start, when I first found out I was pregnant, I knew that I wanted to birth naturally.  I have wanted to for quite some time now, and Justin and I thought it was the best thing for Kyler and me.  I mean, God made women to produce young – so why would I want to do anything unnatural that could risk something dangerous happening to Kyler?  I was not against something being done if my labor lasted forever, or if something would prevent something dangerous.  I just wanted to go the natural route first.  I am so glad I did.  It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life.  And to tell you the truth, I did not have any training whatsoever.  I did read a little bit of the Bradley books (“Husband Coached Childbirth” and “The Bradley Way”) and I did a lot of research online.  But other than that, I did not take any classes or learn any certain method.  I wanted to, but it turned out that the classes didn’t fit at all with our schedule, seeing as they were every Tuesday night (Justin works that night) for 12 weeks in another town.  So that was out. I was upset at first, but I really did not have a problem in the end.  Justin kept reassuring me that having a baby is natural – it may not be easy, but my body will know what to do. He was so right (as always. No really, he’s always right...it's kind of freaky sometimes. ;) I learned a lot from what I read though.  What counts is that you prepare yourself emotionally along with knowledge about it all.  If you are positive with the fact that “you are going natural” then you won’t turn back during labor.  But if you doubt yourself, and start feeling like it is impossible, there is so much more of a chance of you giving in and just taking the epidural.  And believe me, my baby was so much more enjoyable without that stuff! I did take the time to write out a birth plan.  So I researched about the different medicines, what I didn’t want to take and why....just in case there were any nurses wondering why I didn’t want anything (which in my case there weren't, I absolutely loved my hospital experience!) Also what we wanted for Kyler was on there too.  I was able to have him stay in our room for transitioning and during the night as well.  I am so glad I showed my midwife my birth plan before, and explained everything on it to her.  Read on and you'll know why. 
 
 
 
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I was four days past my due date.  Only four days, but I was about to DIE. I had a truly wonderful pregnancy the whole way.  But by the end of my third trimester I was so done being pregnant.  I was ready for my old body back (haha) but most of all I wanted to hold my sweet baby Kyler in my arms! I was pretty antsy. And so was everybody and their brother.  “You haven’t had that baby YET!?” So, I began a new research on how to naturally induce labor. Definitely did NOT want to go with the castor oil. I have a pretty bad gag reflex so I knew that the only place that would get me is my head stuck in the toilet. Supposedly there are certain pressure points you can massage to start labor, but I went with walking. I walked.  And walked.  And walked.  I walked everywhere.  In fact, the day before Kyler was born my family took me shopping to keep me moving. 

 That night when I was around our whole family, I started having contractions. I had Braxton Hicks at 31 weeks when Kyler all of the sudden dropped.  I wasn’t put on bed rest, but I certainly had to take it easy. The practice contractions subsided some, but never completely stopped after that.  But for some reason when I had them that night, I knew they were for real. Or at least would start the real ones.  I didn’t mention it though, because I didn’t want all my family freaking out. Although they were all guessing I would have him the next day.  I ended up doing some other natural things to induce labor, and I think it really got it going.  Plus, Ky man was just ready for the world.  Full speed ahead! When we went to bed, they were starting to get so tight they hurt.  I went to sleep though. But it was such a restless night of crampiness, tightness, and just being totally uncomfortable.  I was half asleep the whole night, so it bothered me, but I just kept dozing.  Early that morning they got so uncomfortable that I was awake at 7 just lying in bed taking them as they came.  I figured I was early in labor.
I woke Justin up and told him, and he went ahead and got up and got his shower so he would be ready whenever the time came.  I was just waiting for my water to break, and I thought it did at first, but I think that was just the end of my mucus plug which had been slowly going away for a while actually.  As I was lying in bed with the contractions, which were pretty steady, I tried to stay as at ease as was possible. You have to embrace the contraction, or else your body will fight it and this only causes labor to last longer.  In my mind, my labor is going to last for DAYS because this is what I have heard! I didn’t want to set myself up for failure by thinking it was going to all go smooth and fast and then not have my nice little birth that I wanted.  I finally woke Justin up to inform him that “THIS IS THE DAY” – weird. But I liked the idea. Unless of course my nightmare would come true and I labored for over 24 hours. 

Justin got up to get his shower and I started to, slowly and in between contractions, gather and pack up for the hospital. I eventually called my midwife to let her know the situation.  I guess I kept it kind of cool because she said I didn’t sound like I was in too much pain and to go take a bath to relax. I did. And I don’t really know if it helped or not. I ended up eating a peanut butter bagel for breakfast…like a dummy. Looking back I’m wondering if I was going through transition at my kitchen table. Ha! It was bad. All this time Justin was timing my contractions and he was the one who convinced me to go NOW to the hospital and I was the one that gave him directions on how to get there. :)
 
Walking into the hospital, I remember just taking everything real slow because it was just contraction after contraction.   I wasn’t sure if we were going to stay or not so I left all our packed bags in the car…can you say, dumb!? Good thing it’s not that far of a trek back to the car for sweet family members to get me everything. Anyways, back to the long trip up there.  We weren’t quite sure where we were going. We had been once before but, my brain. You know how that goes(and if you don't, it goes like nothing's up there sometimes). Let me just say that Justin and I ended up traveling up in the employee elevator.  I wondered “why the odd stares”.  The employees were being very nice to a pregnant lady in pain! They checked me in, weighed me, took their time, put me in a room, hooked me up, and left.  I can’t blame them.  Because of my actions they seriously thought it was going to be a while.  Until I threw up.  I remember Justin looking out the door and saying, “Um, I think she needs someone in here!” When the nurse came in I realized I forgot my birth plan(!), that I so meticulously typed out, and told her, “no epidural, no epidural!”  I’ll never forget, she looked at me and said, “Honey, you’re past the epidural, you’re ready to push!” Well, okay. Here I go!  Everything went really fast at this point, with nurses rushing in and explaining that my midwife wasn’t there yet, having me sign papers while I’m pushing, people telling me not to push and me telling them that Justin can catch the baby. And Justin going, “whaaa?"  The midwife that was there at the time was super sweet + calm and was going back and forth to two rooms with laboring women!  Wonder Woman right there.
When my midwife arrived she (as always) just kept me so calm with her laid back spirit and soft voice.  She knew what was on my birth plan already so that made me feel so much more comfortable.  Pushing wasn’t painful really, it was just plain strenuous (after Kyler was born, Justin was huffing and puffing and trying to get feeling back in his hands and shoulders from where I squeezed them and squatted with his total unselfish help!).  I pushed for a little over an hour and a half.  When it was getting so hard that I thought I couldn’t do it anymore, I heard, “I see his head!”  Good. I’m good. I can do this.  My midwife very wisely gave me a small episiotomy and as soon as she did, out came Kyler Jace Marks, crying into the world! 
 
 
 
 
 
       
 
This is one of the BEST things about going natural.  As tired as I was, I was fully aware of what was going on and instantly held my firstborn son.  Didn’t even feel the stitches at the end.  Okay maybe one or two.  But I could care less, I was holding and seeing my baby. 
 
I talked to Kyler while I was pregnant, but I always did feel sort of silly ;) It was just amazing to look at his face and eyes and kiss his skin.  Those moments were surreal. 
 
 
If I could relive two moments it would be our first kiss (11 seconds :) and giving birth.  The miracle of bringing a separate life into the world and the complete + rewarding exhaustion.  What was a family of two instantly became three.  And we were all three so connected. 
 
Before this, I loved Justin a lot. A LOT. But I loved him even more after seeing him as a daddy. 
 
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Plus all the love for Kyler… my poor heart was the exhausted one.  Now my heart is willingly expanding for one more little human.  Come November this family of three will be a family of four.  And we will be so connected.
 
 
 
>>all pictures courtesy of my sister and brother-in-law of J&L Photography<<
 
 
 

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